New Go to Music

I have fallen in love with their words & their music.  My favorite song of theirs in "Yahweh."  When I need a pick me up or simply want to listen to soft music, this is my new go to group.  Enjoy.

Elevation Worship

Another friend gone too soon......

One of my favorite supervisors from work, Jana Davison, passed away this morning after a long battle with cancer.

You know how they say that everyone enters your life for a reason?  I wholeheartedly believe that to be true. I have met some of the most amazing people who will have a lasting impact on my life.  Each person has contributed to who I am in some way, shape, or form; and for that I am grateful.  There are certain people, though, like Jana Moss-Davison, who have a very special place in your heart.  The ones you will never forget and can't thank God enough for crossing your paths. 

I never imagined that good-bye would come so soon. Jana, you were such a great supervisor and friend. Your warm heart, your genuine compassion, and absolute care for your fellow man/woman was unmatched by anyone. I know you're completely healed now and worshiping the God who created & loved you.  And I also know that this really isn't good-bye....but until we meet again.  Godspeed Jana Moss-Davison. 

Here's her life in a nutshell: 

"We all know too well the pain, suffering, and loss caused by cancer, every so often you hear a story about someone’s cancer experience that just leaves you speechless and, if you didn’t know it to be true, you wouldn’t believe it. It’s just too awful and unfair. For me, that’s Jana’s story.

Cancer’s relentless presence in Jana’s life started when she was a child when she lost her mother to cancer and watched many other dear relatives succumb to the disease. Later, as an adult she and her husband experienced the devastating loss of their 3-year old son, Devon, to brain cancer. And, as if cancer had not reaped enough heartache in her life, it came back to haunt Jana again that very same year of losing her son – this time as a personal diagnosis of breast cancer. Jana faced this diagnosis with a fierce determination and won. Sadly, her battle against cancer didn’t end there. Jana went on to face three more different cancer diagnoses over the past 10 years.

No doubt, Jana’s story can be described as tragic. But, I think her story is best described as heroic and inspiring because of her gracious style and amazing attitude. Throughout her journey, Jana remained a positive force with a depth for forgiveness and understanding and warrior approach to get through everything that came her way. It’s clear that Jana was far more than a colleague, she was our friend and one of the most dedicated and inspiring people many of us in the OCFO and at ACS have ever had the privilege to know.

Jana has touched my life in an unexpected way and I will always be grateful that I crossed paths with her.

Jana is survived by her husband, Durand, and their daughters, Haven and Mellini. 

It’s at times like this that we are reminded of the importance of our mission and it is my hope that you all understand the vital role you all play in helping those affected by this disease. Jana often talked about the difference the ACS made in her life and her son’s and she could not have been more proud of the role she played to support our shared mission and her teammates.

Please join me in keeping Jana and the rest of her family in your thoughts and prayers.

Jana, you are such a very special person and I will never forget you, your story, your spirit or your soul. You are indeed a hero and will be with me (and many others) forever. In my opinion, one of the characteristics of a true leader is to inspire others in ways you will never actually know yourself. Thank you for playing an important role in my personal development - you inspire me to be a better person."

-Life in a nutshell & following is from email sent out to everyone at ACS

In front of me stands HOPE!

Principle 2: Earnestly believe that God exist, that I matter to Him, and the He has the power to help me recover. "Happy are those who Mourn, for they shall be comforted." (Matthew 5:4)

Step 2: I came to believe that a power greater than myself could restore me to sanity. "For it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose." (Philippians 2:13)

                                                     ---------------------------------------------------

When I first came to Celebrate Recovery, not only was I full of shame, but I felt I was hopeless. I believed that I had fallen too far from grace since I felt there was no way a Christian could knowingly continue in sin in over-indulgence.  That burden of hopelessness was too much carry. It paralyzed me during the beginning stages of my recovery.  

But God is faithful and He wrapped his arms of love around me, reminding me that he bore all of my sins - past, present, and future.  Wow. I was comforted by his peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7) as He reassured me that I was completely forgiven.  It’s difficult to comprehend, but God not only forgave me, He wiped my slate clean promising to remember my sins no more (Hebrews 8:12).  I no longer felt separated from Him because He lifted the weight of condemnation and shame.  I no longer needed to focus on the greatness of my sins.  I began to focus on the greatness of my Savior. And for the first time I began to have hope again.

My Sponsor kept challenging me not to quit before the miracle happened. That hope is what opened the door to the next level of recovery. By His grace I was finally able to forgive myself; and His grace is what kept bringing me closer and closer to Him. God is now using my story to give hope to others.

Even as I face the largest mountain that I've ever endured, there is still hope in front of me.  God promises me that He has the best intentions for me and that I still have a future (Jeremiah 29:11).  I know that I'm going to be okay because His hands are still holding me.

Change Happens When You Allow It

"Anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. 

The old life is gone; a new life has begun!"  2 Corinthians 5:17

Change happens if you allow it.  I was tired of giving my past the power to bring me down. 

The shift was a learning experience for me.  Not only did it represent a change in me heart, but a significant and permanent shift in my perspective and direction. 

It was symbolic in the sense that I was truly letting go.  No longer would I dedicate my thoughts to all the pain, hurt, struggles, or hardships.  My purpose was now fixed on sharing positive things, both to myself and to other people.  I felt the urge to tell others about what God can do in the life and heart of any person regardless of anything that they may consider "too shameful" or "not good enough"......

He can take ashes and make them beautiful.
He can take what you thought was permanent damage, and turn it into a permanent purpose.

Choosing to accept God's love was HUGE. 
By doing so, I chose to believe that God loved me, that I have a purpose that exceeded far beyond the chaos that I was so wrapped in. 

Through Him, I learned how to love others appropriately. 
This was a game-changer.

Instead of refusing to shift my focus, I allowed myself to believe that there really could be another way to look at things.  I didn't have to stay stuck.  I could choose to look beyond everything that I thought I knew.  My feelings were valid, but that didn't mean that the way I saw the outcome of my struggles had to be the only way.  I chose to trust God. 

All of that pain, the scary times, the uncertainty, feelings of inadequacy, the moments I thought "defined" me as a person.......it all began to look and feel different.

God took the very same things that I hated and turned them into things that I can now say I wouldn't ever go back and change or make different.

The beautiful part is that because of every single one of the experiences that I have lived through, they have left me with a little piece of something that I can use or draw from to help someone else. 

God gives us new lives. Through His Grace, we are given a clean slate. We are no longer tied to the heavy weight of the past.  We are tied to our past and it's okay.  It's finally......okay.

We can turn around and look at all the wreckage with happy tears in our eyes and in our hearts - because that wreckage prepared us for better things.

We are now free.... to appreciate the sunsets, to smile, the friends who hold us accountable, to extend our love to strangers, and so much more.  We appreciate every morning that we wake up one day stronger  - we get to see the world in a whole new way.


....... and all this after we had been people who believed in our hearts, that we were nothing more than throw away people......


That, is beautiful.

That.........is a God thing. 

I Still See You

How you see you:

You see failure.

You see right through yourself.

You feel angry when you see what you have become.

Shame consumes you, blinding you from seeing hope for any kind of change.

You see how far you have fallen.

You see all of the destruction you have created.

You can't see your future anymore. 

You don't want anyone to see the real you. 

You wonder if anyone else can see you at all.

How "I" see you: 

I see your empty eyes that were once full of life

I see your dreams.

I see your tears.

I can see the hurt in your face.

I see the regret.

I also see your potential and all your talent.

I remember seeing your smile.

I recall the light in your being when you talked about your goals.

I can still see all of the life that you have left.

I can still see you.

How God sees you: 

Someone who can be forgiven.

Who is worthy of His kind of Love.

Somebody who is enough. 

Who is worth saving.

Who is precious.

Who is capable, through His Strength, to start over fresh, as a new person.

A person who shines.

Someone with a calling and a purpose.

You are much more than what meets the eye......

(so much more than we can even begin to comprehend).

HE sees you.

I hope that one day YOU allow yourself, to see you.......

What God Says...

"Tell me, once again, who I am to You, that I belong to You . . ."

A song that has been touching my heart lately is "Remind Me Who I Am" by Jason Gray.  One of the great things I have learned through Celebrate Recovery is that I am no longer the person I used to be.  Jesus says I am a new creation!  Where the world has labeled me, criticized me, and condemned me . . . Jesus has loved me, accepted me, and changed me!

The world calls us, "addict," "alcoholic," "co-dependent," "victim," etc. . . Jesus calls us, "children," "beloved," "chosen people."

The world tells us we are guilty . . . Jesus tells us we are forgiven!

The world tells us to get even, hold grudges, and refuse to forgive . . . Jesus tells us that He will help us to forgive others.

The world says, "You're gonna pay for that!" . . . Jesus says, "I already did."

The world looks at us with hatred, contempt, and condemnation . . . Jesus looks at us with love, grace, and compassion.

Too often we can get caught up in how the world sees us and what the world tells us.  If we have turned our lives and wills over to God, all we need to be concerned with is how He sees us and what He tells us!

Hello My Name Is … Free Indeed

Hello My Name Is … Free Indeed | The Waters Church

I am free. Indeed. :-)